On Writing and Poop

This past weekend I had the priviledge of attending a writing conference nearby. Great energy, great ideas, and I feel motivated to work on my novel (#4, in case you're counting). I've heard that it takes at least that many to get your feet wet in the how-to-write-well department, so I'm hoping this latest round of energy infusion will help propel me to a novel that will sell.

OTOH, I spoke with one person (a reader for the conference) who suggested non-fiction articles to sell to magazines. Not my passion, not my interest, but possible since I have the expertise and could very well do a good job at it. Something to think about, anyway.

Of course, since the conference was nearby, but a bit too far to drive on a daily basis, I chose to take the RV (kids with their dad). And, of course, the dogs. I chose a nearby campground and we spent a relaxing Friday before the conference, taking a leisurely walk around the almost-empty campground. Would I attend the social mixer? Me? Uh, no. Maybe if I'd gone with someone, but I'm not really a meet-and-greet-and small-talk kind of girl.

So, the conference brochure said comfortable casual, but I doubted that jeans and a sweatshirt bearing the Disney character Grumpy would be a good idea, so I chose corduroys and a blouse. To me, that's dressed up. To the rest of the modern world, it's ultra casual. Anyway, I leave the campground early, in the RV (I have no way to tow my car; all of my tow money went for the dog!). No sooner do I get on the main road and I hear the door rattling. Rats. I forgot to lock it. Oh, well, the conference is only 5 miles away. Two seconds later, the propane detector goes off. Fortunately I'd been warned that, not unlike a smoke detector that goes off every time I try to cook (don't laugh!), the propane detector also detects smells.

Well, I can't quite get up and turn it off while I'm driving, so this screeching is getting annoying. And that's when the smell wafts up to the driver's seat. A bad dog fart. Or so I hoped. I was wrong.

What I found when I stopped was poop. On my pillow. Down the wall. On my comforter. Did I mention I was dressed up for a conference?? So I clean it up as best I can. While my RV has more amenities than I originally thought I could afford, alas, it lacks a washer and dryer, which is what I really needed. Somehow I managed to clean up without getting crap on my nice clothes. Off to the conference I go.

Later, I drive back to the campground, park, hook up the electricity, and decided to change out of my monkey clothes into something more comfortable. A balmy breeze blew in off the water, so I stepped around the bed to get a pair of shorts from my drawer. Big mistake. I ended up stepping in a pile of poop that had been there since the morning incident, but I had missed. Did I mention I had sock feet??

Does anyone want a dog? Cheap?!

One of Life's Curve Balls

Dog: $40

Collar and Leash: $25

Surgery to remove an ugly abdominal mass: $2600

The Queen Bee gets to go camping again: PRICELESS!!

Bumper Stickers

Free the Children!

Cultivate Mindfulness.

Living is Learning is Unschooling.

Don't Believe Everything You Think

Children Should be Seen AND Heard!

Children -- The Last Minority

While it is now considered politically incorrect for us as a society to poke fun at any ethnic groups, it's still considered okay to disrespect and bash children. Every day across America we hear parents lament about their kids being lazy, manipulative, disrespectful, uncooperative, backtalking slackers who need to be shown how the real world works, usually by dishing out punishment, taking away privileges--basically by shaming and blaming them.

Then we hear things like: "I'm so glad they're back in school! It's tough being around them all day!" or "I need to keep up the battle so he grows up responsible."
(usually because the kid hasn't done his chores, or helped out extra when asked).

And when I question these people I get typical responses:

Children need to be told NO.
Children need to learn Boundaries.
They're going to hear NO from teachers and employers and need to learn how to Deal with It.

If I so much a suggest otherwise, ie treating children as guests in my home, saying yes whenever possible, meeting their needs, respecting their choices and decisions, allowing them freedom to decide what's best for them, I'm met with:

If there are no rules, what's to stop your kid from not brushing his/her teeth? from eating candy all day? from cutting holes in the carpet? from running his sister over with his bike? from smacking the kitten with a skillet? from playing in the road?

Saying yes when possible, giving our kids information to navigate the world, and teaching them respect by modeling respect is NOT leaving them to fend for themselves with no direction. Being actively involved with kids, giving them information, and helping them learn the skills necessary to get along in life.

What constantly amazes me though is how adamant and militant these parents can be. I guess it sounds totally crazy to suggest that there might be another way--a way where constant harping on your kids and potentially damaging your relationship with them just doesn't have to be--that they just get spitting mad.

An example:

A mom posted online about the fear and terror she experienced when her young son had a febrile seizure. Totally understandable.

But then, subsequent posts she complained about his attitude, how he'd become manipulative, how he wanted to use the incident to his advantage. How he's acting out (kicking), hitting, and yelling NO! when they try to send him to Time Out.

I suggested that maybe, just maybe, her son had been equally scared during the incident, and even more scared when he saw his parents freaking out, and that rather than yelling and time outs, maybe the whole family cuddling on the sofa with a favorite movie and a favorite snack might make the whole family feel better. That maybe his acting out was his way of dealing with the stress of the whole thing, and a bit of extra attention and understanding might be necessary.

You'd have thought I had attacked all of motherhood! Maybe I have.

What I do know is this: Treat your kids the way you want to be treated, and the old adage is true: You reap what you sow.

Children Learn What They Live

If a child lives with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive,
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves,
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.
But do not despair ...
If a child lives with tolerance, they learn to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If a child lives with praise, they learn to appreciate.
If a child lives with fairness, they live with justice.
If a child lives with security, they live to have faith.
If a child lives with approval, they learn to like himself.
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship.
they learn to find love in the world.

— Dorothy Law Nolte

Right Brain vs Left Brain

Maybe I'm just weird, but I swear she's going clockwise, then she'll start going the other way.

Tell me which way she dances for you!

Watch the Dancer

Fun (Addicting!) Halloween Game

Cat Bowling

Don't say I didn't warn you! But if you're looking for a good time waster that's fun, give this a whirl. What's your highest score?

Stuff on My Dog

The latest in beach-wear fashion.

I spent the day writing (almost 17,000 words into my WIP), researching (whose jurisdiction is it for a couple of murders), taking care of dogs (my old dog has a large mass in her belly, which in turn is causing her to have to go outside to pee nearly every hour, on the hour), grocery shopping, cooking dinner (roast beef and baked potatoes; my kids chose fish sticks?!) and doing laundry.

I'd call that a productive day. I may grab a novel from my TBR pile and turn in early.

Rules vs Principles

A discussion ensued on a board I frequent, but it's so heavily moderated that I was given the boot. My controversial post? Read below:

Varied Diet

I stole this from someone else, who likely got it online somewhere.

Yesterday I went to the doctor for my yearly physical.
My blood pressure was high, my cholesterol was high,
I'd gained some weight, and I didn't feel so hot.
My doctor said eating right doesn't have to
be complicated and it would solve my physical
problems. He said just think in colors...
Fill your plate with bright colors... greens,
yellows, reds, etc.

I went right home and ate an
entire bowl of : (see below)

And sure enough, I felt better immediately.
I never knew eating right
could be so easy.

Hugs

There's a new trend in middle and high schools to ban hugs amongst students. Reasons given are clogged hallways and hugs that are too close and too long. I personally think school rules are becoming ludicrous.

The scary thing is, there are a lot of people who are fine with that; fine with arbitrary knee-jerk rules to keep order in the prisons...er, schools.

So, if public hugs were banned tomorrow amongst adults, they'd be fine with that?

This reminded me of a video on You Tube a while back.

HUGS <--- click here